Monday, November 22, 2010

Making Boys Into Gentlemen

God has blessed me with two incredibly handsome boys (and a gorgeous little girl, but my rant about her will wait for another day). Two boys who bring joy to my face everyday and laughter about every two minutes. Two boys who are two complete different species that sometimes have me scratching my head.

I grew up with all sisters. By the time my brother came around and could finally walk and talk and have a personality, I was already out of the house. So most of what I know about children comes from my experience with girls.

Girls hit. Girls sob. Girls bat their eyelashes and wrinkle up their noses when they want something...girls are drama for the sake of drama.

I'm well versed in this. So well versed, in fact, that I told God that when I had children I only wanted one girl and the rest all boys. He could give me twenty boys and I would the happiest mother around, as long as I only had ONE girl.

I need a girl to spoil. Every woman needs her princess. A real life doll that I can dress up any way I wish. I would do her hair perfectly everyday, we would share girl nights, make up, and shoes. I need a girl. But only one.

So to my great delight, my first child was a boy! For one, it took off all the pressure that the family name would for sure be passed along. Phew... But second, things were starting off pretty well because it wasn't a girl and I knew I could at least have one more child without that fear of TWO girls!!!

Owen and I had two full years together of just us. I wasn't working at all, and he and I became the best of friends. I think this is where his sensitivity got mixed in a little bit with the "all boy" that a lot of boys are. Owen loves to wrestle, get dirty, be loud, do things without thinking...you know all things that boys (and men alike) are good at.

But Owen can also sit down and be still. He can be quiet. He's sensitive. He can read books, draw and write, and he is very compassionate. I like to think that it's from our time alone when I was able to instill these values that he became such a sweet boy. (Ha!)

But something has happened. Owen is changing. Suddenly a burp or "toot" is the funniest thing in the world! Making armpit noises makes him an instant comedian. One minute he will be playing as nice as can be with Amra, and the next he's taking her out with one swift pull of a blanket that she just happened to be standing on.

My sensitive boy is becoming a BEAST!!!

Wrigley came out of the womb "all boy". The kid has sat on the couch and watched ball games with his dad since he was an infant. He didn't just start walking, he was running. He needs a ball to throw, kick, catch, etc. He never had the advantage of alone time with a nurturing mother. He has no interest in books and the only thing he likes about coloring is getting as much marker on his hands and arms as he can. His direct example is Owen and at two years old he is constantly chasing "bad guys" through the house with any handmade or toy gun he can get his hands on.

Wrigley, of course, also thinks Owen's burping and flatulance is the highlight of the dinner table, and if Owen is beating Amra, Wrigley is right there with him.

Sigh...boys are not quite what I envisioned.

But you know what? They are an absolute joy in my home. They make me laugh and they put on the best shows ever! Not a day goes by that I'm not so grateful for my little men.

And they still show glimmers of hope that one day they will become gentlemen.

Owen was right beside me the other day while I got my eyebrows waxed. He saw that it hurt, and he instantly held his hand out and told me to squeeze it. And then when it was done, he gave me a hug and said, "I'm sorry that hurt mom."

And Wrigley is all love. He always has a kiss or hug for me, and with his arms up he says, "'Old me mom".

Boys will be boys, but my prayer is that someday they will be "gentle"men.

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